Leah Alone
by persephonesfolly
Summary: Some love stories don't have happy endings.  Contains spoilers for Eclipse.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: The plot and characters of New Moon, Twilight, and Eclipse all belong to Stephanie Meyer, not me.

A/N: For the purposes of this story Leah and Sam are the same age. The only indication I could find of their relative ages was when Jacob told Bella that Sam and Leah started dating when she was a freshman, but he never said what grade level Sam was at that time (at least not on that page of the book). I'm also making Emily the same age as Leah, since they were supposed to be as close as sisters and they would be more likely to behave that way towards each other if there weren't many years' gap between their ages.

CHAPTER ONE: Love

I am Leah, and I am alone.

I look out at the snow whirling about in gusts outside my window. The windowpane is cool and slick under my fingertips. My breath appears in puffs of vapor, even though I'm inside, but I am not cold. The abandoned research station where I now live was built for durability, but not necessarily for comfort. Judging by the number of parkas I found in the storage lockers, the research team who used to live here must have worn them inside as well as out.

Soon I'll be outside, running in that chill wind. It's time to hunt.

0-0-0

It wasn't always like this.

I can remember a time, so sweetly, when I was never alone. Growing up on the Quileute reservation, with my mom, dad, and little brother, Seth, there was always someone around. When you live in a tiny little two storey house, there's very little privacy, but I didn't mind. School on the reservation meant more chaos, the noise and laughter of friends.

School was where I fell in love with Sam Uley.

He was my age, in the same grade, and he was wonderful. Those first dates with their shy, stilted conversation quickly gave way to warmth and a friendship that deepened into something more. I loved him, and he loved me. We were in our last year of high school, making plans for the future. We'd even spoken of marriage, in the distant future of course, after college. We thought we had all the time in the world. We gave ourselves to each other. There was a moment, in the midst of it, as we lay together, where I could have pushed him away, but I didn't. He was my first, and I was his. It was as it should be.

Then everything changed.

He was supposed to meet me after school, but he never showed up. He'd disappeared.

We are Quileute. Our reservation spans many acres. They sent out the police, the park rangers, and our own men. Our trackers are some of the best in the world, but none of them could find Sam.

I spent a lot of time with Mrs. Uley, at the Uley house. She seemed to be the only one who could understand my frantic desperation. She was also the one the Quileute searchers reported to, and I needed to know what was happening. The trail went cold. A week passed, then two. It was painful to watch the hope fade from Mrs. Uley's eyes. I'm sure she saw the same thing in mine.

Then Sam returned. No one found him, he just staggered into the house, half naked, through the back door.

Mrs. Uley and I heard the crash of the door as it smacked into the wall of the kitchen. We stared at each other for a second, then ran as we heard Sam's voice call out.

He stood in the door frame, his hair wild, wearing jeans that didn't fit. They were wet, like they'd come off someone's clothesline. I don't know why that detail stuck in my head, but it did. Then Sam's mom and I were at his side, hugging him, laughing and crying.

He shrugged us off.

"Don't touch me!" he said.

I can still remember the hurt.

"But Sam, we've been so worried…" Mrs. Uley began.

Sam, my beloved Sam, looked at us as if we were strangers, then brushed by us roughly.

"Leave me alone!" he screamed as he slammed the door to his room, shutting himself in. Shutting us out.

I turned to follow him, but stopped when I felt Mrs. Uley's hand on my arm.

"Don't," she implored. "I'll talk to him later, when he's calmer. You go on home, Leah. I know your parents are missing you."

Looking into her eyes, I felt my protests die on my lips. Mr. Uley wasn't exactly a model husband, and I wondered how many times she'd had to wait for him to calm down. It was an open secret that he'd been an alcoholic, and that he'd abused her. I thought of my mom and dad, the way they loved each other, and how patient they'd been, letting me spend so many hours with Mrs. Uley. I didn't want to, but I went home.

Sam never did say where he'd been, or what he'd been doing. The rumors flew around school. The stories ranged from drug running, to alcoholic binges in the city, to terrorism. Sam sat quietly in class, and refused to speak to me or sit with me at lunch for three whole days. When I tried, once, to take his hand, he shied away like I was contagious. I'd had enough.

I cornered him in the library, where he'd ducked in to avoid me during lunch. He'd found a quiet corner and was just setting his backpack down on a desk when I came up from behind him. He turned to look at me, and it was like he already knew it was me before he saw my face. He had this resigned, wary look in his eyes. I ignored it.

"Sam Uley, if you don't stop avoiding me, you'll never graduate."

It was the last thing he expected me to say. He just stood there, open-mouthed.

"You lost two weeks of school. If you want to catch up, you need my help."

Those two weeks had been hell for me, but I'd clung to the thought that Sam would come back, so I'd gone to school, forced myself to pay attention so I could give the homework and notes to Sam when he came back. They were in my book bag, so I slung it off my shoulder, reached in and grabbed the folder where I'd put everything, and slammed it own on the desk.

As I stared at it, at the stupidly inoffensive green folder, I felt tears welling up in my eyes.

"If you don't want me anymore, that's fine," I lied. "But you still need the makeup work, and we covered a lot of new stuff in math, and you know how much you suck at math, so you're going to sit down and listen while I explain it."

I tried to sound stern, and angry. Sam saw right through me. His arms came around me, and he held me as I sniffled against his chest.

"I'm sorry, Leah. I'm so sorry." His voice was like rough gravel, rumbling through his chest.

"I don't want you to be sorry, I want you to be alright."

I felt his short, bitter bark of a laugh shake his body. "I don't think I'll ever be alright ever again."

I raised me head from where it rested against his shoulder and looked up at him, but he wasn't looking back at me. He was gazing up at a window set high in the wall, above the bookshelves. His expression was so bleak. It chilled me.

"Then let me help you," I begged softly. "Whatever it is, we can get through it, together."

Sam looked at me. His eyes were filled with misery.

"I love you, Leah," he whispered.

Those eyes, that much sadness, it scared me.

I smiled. I couldn't let him see my fear. It would destroy him. "Then show it by passing math, OK?"

I stepped back from him, taking him by the hand and leading him to the study desk.

Our lives took on a semblance of normal from that point on. Sam still refused to speak about what happened those two weeks he was gone. He was moody, depressed at times, but he was still my Sam and I loved him.

I knew his father was an alcoholic, and I began to wonder if the rumors that he'd been off on an alcoholic binge were true. Yet I never saw him drink so much as a beer.

He was so careful around me too, like he was afraid to touch me. I knew how much he loved his mother, how it had nearly killed him as a child to watch the way his dad hurt his mom when he'd come home drunk. I wondered if he thought he might accidentally hurt me the same way.

He was supposed to pick me up for dinner one night after school. We were going to drive to Olympia, go to a nice restaurant. It was a sort of celebration. Sam got an A on his math midterm. He still had a chance of passing the class.

He never showed up. As I waited, in my one good dress, I couldn't help but remember those two weeks when Sam left before. I called his mom, but she didn't know where he was either. She promised she'd have him call me the minute he returned home. Mom and dad did their best to take my mind off my worry. Seth even gave me a hug before going to bed, forgetting that he was 'too old for that girly stuff'.

I barely slept at all that night.

The next morning Sam appeared on our doorstep. I went outside so we could talk in private.

"Where were you?" I burst out. "I waited most of the night for you."

"I'm sorry, Leah."

He did look morose, but I didn't care. Didn't he care how much I'd worried over him? Didn't he care what he put me through? I forged ahead.

"Answer the question, Sam!" I said sharply. "What was so important that you couldn't at least call me to let me know you weren't coming?"

His face clouded over. "It's not like I had a choice!" he yelled back.

I blinked. Sam never yelled, except at basketball games and stuff like that.

"Do you think I wanted to be away from you? God, Leah, I would've given anything to be with you last night."

"Then why weren't you? Why?" I yelled right back.

Sam opened his mouth, then turned away. He turned his back on me.

I grabbed his shoulder, trying to force him to turn around, to look at him. I gripped him as hard as I could, but he shrugged me off like I was nothing.

"Don't touch me," he ordered hoarsely.

He was shaking. I took a step back. Suddenly all my anger melted away. This was Sam, and he was hurting. I reached out to him, then let my hand drop to my side.

"I don't know how to help you if you don't tell me what's going on." I heard the tell-tale catch in my voice. I hoped Sam didn't realize how close to tears I was. "Please, just tell me what's wrong."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"I just…" Sam turned back around to face me, and seemed to take in for the first time that I was standing barefoot in my nightgown and tatty old robe. "Geez, Leah, you've got to be freezing."

I'd been standing for some time on the cold, wet grass of our front lawn. I felt like pointing out to Sam that dawn wasn't the best time for outside conversations, and that he was only wearing a tee shirt and jeans and was probably colder than I was, but it seemed so pointless. Everything seemed pointless. Why were we arguing?

"Don't you…like me anymore?"

Sam looked dumbfounded by my question.

"Leah," he said slowly. "Don't you know by now that you're the only thing good and sane in my life?"

He shook his head, as if warding away some mental image I couldn't see. "If I didn't have you, I'd go crazy. Like you? I love you more than anyone. I will always love you."

He moved fast, so fast I barely saw his feet move, then he was at my side, his arms around me. "No matter what happens, I will always love you."

Just like that, everything was OK. I hugged him back. "Promise?" I asked softly.

"I promise."

I snuggled into his warmth. Sam loved me. It was my lifeline. Whatever happened I'd always have him. I was so sure of it. That's why the breakup was such a shock.

0-0-0

Old Mr. Ateara was waiting for Sam one day after school. He was a tribal elder. I knew his son, Quil, who was in drama class with me. Sam and I had plans to go to the basketball game that night, but Mr. Ateara insisted Sam come with him, so Sam went. You didn't disobey tribal elders. I thought maybe they were going to try again to get him to say where he'd been those two weeks he'd disappeared. I snorted to myself and wished them luck. Sam hadn't even told me. He'd get upset whenever I brought it up, so I dropped it. He'd tell me when he was ready to. We had our whole lives together, and I could be patient.

I didn't think anything of it, until Sam tried to break up with me the next day. He kept saying it was 'for my own good' like that made it better somehow. I asked him if he'd stopped loving me, and all he could do was shake his head mutely. That's when I knew I'd just have to be patient.

Eventually, he gave up and started seeing me again. He also started hanging out with Jared and Paul, two younger boys. I smiled at the way they looked up to Sam. It was like they idolized him. He started calling their little group, 'The Protectors'. It never occurred to me that there was anything wrong or off about his influence over them. Sam was a natural leader, and if Jared and Paul were drawn by his abilities, well, they could do a whole lot worse in choosing a mentor. He took them hunting and fishing. I didn't mind the time we spent apart so he could be with them, because he always came back to me. I started dreaming of what it would be like when we had children. God help me, I saw it as practicing for how he'd be when we had sons.

Still, I was shocked when Sam told me he wouldn't be going to college, that he couldn't leave the boys. We had one of our worst arguments about that.

"You don't understand! They need me!"

"I need you too!" I yelled back. We were out by mom's vegetable garden out back. Thankfully, she, dad, and Seth weren't home to witness the fight since they'd gone to shop for my high school graduation present. They thought I didn't know that they were planning to get me a laptop computer for college.

"What about Washington State? What about your scholarship?" We'd both got partial scholarships when we were accepted. We'd have to get part time jobs to make it through, but Sam and I decided it was worth it to be together when we received our acceptance letters. We'd applied other places too, but Washington State was the only place we'd both been accepted.

"That doesn't matter to me," Sam said impatiently. "There are more important things in life than college."

"Like what?" I was furious. Sam was so smart, so incredible. Did he really want to stay on the reservation forever? I could, but it was different for me. I had a family that loved me, but I was nothing special. Not like Sam, who could be anything he wanted.

"Like protecting people."

"Protecting people?" I let me voice become incredulous. "From what? What do we need to be protected from?"

Sam got quiet then. "You have no idea."

"Then tell me! Or is it another one of your secrets?" I clenched my fists. There was something I'd been keeping inside for too long. "I am so tired of this. I know you go off with Paul and Jared sometimes on the weekends, but where do you go at night?" I'd called his house a couple of times when he'd said he was staying in with his mom, only to have her tell me he'd said he was going to my house.

A guilty look stole across Sam's face. My heart dropped.

"Where do you go?" I asked again when it was clear he wasn't going to answer. "Is it another woman? Are you cheating on me?" I knew it wasn't drugs because Sam, Paul, and Jared had scared off a drug dealer from up near the Makah reservation not too long ago.

"No!" His denial was quick and furious. "After all this time, how could you think that?"

"Then what? What is it?"

Sam was shaking with rage. "Stop asking me, OK? I can't tell you!"

"Why not?" 

"Because I can't! Now just leave it alone. Leave me alone!" And with that Sam was gone, racing through the woods in back of our house like he couldn't wait to get away from me.

We made up of course. I decided to send my regrets to Washington State so I could stay with Sam. My parents were surprisingly cool about it. They liked Sam, and they knew how much I loved him. Sam still wouldn't tell me what was going on, but he asked me to trust him. How could I refuse? He swore it wasn't anything illegal or immoral, and I believed him. I told myself every relationship had secrets. I just didn't know that ours would prove fatal.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO: Emily

Emily came for graduation. We're cousins. Second cousins, but we loved each other like sisters. Our families always spent the holidays together. It wasn't all that far to the Makah reservation, so they were always driving down or we'd drive up. Emily's graduation was the week before ours. It was right in the middle of final exams week so I couldn't be at hers, but our families were happy to let her come to my graduation and spend the summer with us.

Emily had never met Sam before. My parents were understanding, and I think they might have guessed that Sam and I were doing more than just kissing on our dates, but they were still old fashioned enough to not invite Sam along on family vacations to the Makah reservation. The times Emily's family were down visiting us, Sam's mom had taken him to spend the holiday with her folks.

I so wanted them to like each other. Looking back now, I can't believe how stupid I was. Emily was beautiful, inside as well as out. How could Sam resist?

Emily came the day before graduation. We'd been baking. Emily loved to cook. It's one of the things I admired about her. We always joked that she'd have to marry someone skinny to fatten up. Mom and dad were out, and Seth was watching TV in the front room when Sam came through to the kitchen. Like I said, my parents were understanding people, and Sam was allowed to come and go as he pleased. I think they knew that one day soon, if I had my way, he'd literally be one of the family.

We were laughing and joking around at the sink. I was washing and Emily was drying. I heard Sam's voice and turned to greet him, still holding the glass pyrex brownie pan in my hand.

"Hey, Sam," I said, still laughing at some outrageous remark Emily had made. He stood in the doorway of the kitchen, his brown eyes warm, eyebrows raised as if asking what the joke was.

I nudged Emily with my elbow so she'd turn around too.

"This is Emily, my cousin. Remember I told you she was coming to visit?" I asked rhetorically.

Emily turned around and the world stopped.

At least that's what it must have been like for Sam. I was looking at her as she turned and watched her put a polite smile on her face. Most people think Emily is demure and quiet when they first meet her. They don't know how giggly and silly she can be when you put enough sugar in her, and when she feels comfortable with you.

"She's going to be able to stay the whole summer, isn't that great?" I prattled on, heedlessly dripping water from the pan onto the kitchen floor. "Her parents are going to visit her grandpa in Florida so we've got her for three months and…"

I stopped talking when I noticed the polite smile fading from Emily's face.

Sam was staring at her. I don't think 'staring' is really the right word. It was like he was drinking her in with his eyes. His mouth was slightly open. He was mesmerized by her.

Emily looked at me for help.

I shrugged helplessly. "Sam? You OK?"

Even while I was right there in the room, watching it, I still didn't recognize love at first sight.

"Emily?" Sam breathed out my cousin's name, tasting it like candy on his tongue. "You're Emily?"

Emily nodded uncertainly. I couldn't blame her for being freaked out. I was starting to freak out a little too.

"I love you."

I looked back at Sam, expecting to see him looking back at me, but he wasn't. His eyes were on Emily. He was speaking to her.

The baking dish shattered into a thousand pieces as I dropped it on the floor.

0-0-0

Graduation was a blur. I suppose I must have stood up with everyone else, received my diploma, marched out of the gym during the recessional. There are pictures proving I was there in my cap and gown, but my mind was some place else.

Emily was a trooper. After Sam dropped his little bombshell in the kitchen she told him to leave. He'd had the grace to look ashamed, then went. I apologized all over the place for Sam. I told her it must've been a joke. She nodded. Then I broke down. She knew about Sam's missing two weeks. When I wasn't with Mrs. Uley, I'd been crying on my parents' shoulders or on the phone with Emily. We decided it must be alcohol. Sam had to have a drinking problem. It's so easy to come up with answers you think are right when you're with friends, and Emily was my best friend. That's what I thought.

Sam still came to the house to visit. We all tried to pretend that nothing had changed, but everything had. My parents felt the tension when Sam and Emily were in the same room. She kept excusing herself to go upstairs when Sam came over, but even then it was like most of his attention was on her. He tried to hide it, those first days of summer. He took me out on dates, kissed me goodnight, but gave me nothing more than kisses.

I missed it. I missed him.

When he was with me, he wasn't really with me. His eyes followed Emily every time he saw her. When she was in the room it was like I didn't exist. It hurt. Emily held me when I cried. She was angry for me. It kept me from hating her, from blaming her.

Then it happened. We were coming back from that cheesy lodge style diner in Forks. Sam pulled over to the side of the road and stopped.

"I can't do this anymore, Leah," he said dully.

I think I knew what was coming. The burger and fries I'd forced myself to eat lay like lead in my stomach.

"Do what?"

"Be with you," Sam said softly to the dashboard. "I can't be with you anymore."

I was silent. Until then I didn't know it was possible to hurt so much that you literally couldn't talk.

"I'm sorry, it's just that I love Emily."

Her name galvanized me. I welcomed the flush of red hot anger coursing through me. It was better than feeling like I'd died.

"Well she doesn't love you!" I told him spitefully. "She never will love you. She wouldn't betray me like that. She's not like you."

His hands tightened on the steering wheel, so hard I could've sworn I heard it start to crack under the strain, then he very deliberately took his hands from the wheel and placed them in his lap.

"I'm sorry," he said again. "It doesn't change anything. I love her."

"So what about me? What about the fact that I love you? That I stood by you? You promised me, Sam. You promised you'd always love me!" I was getting hysterical, my voice was rising, getting higher and higher in pitch as I gasped for breath. "You promised!"

Sam flinched. "I know, and I'm sorry…"

"Sorry?" I whispered incredulously. "You're sorry you're dumping me for my cousin?" I scrabbled at the door handle. "You can just go to hell, Sam Uley."

Wrenching the door open, I stumbled out and plunged into the forest. This was Washington, there was always forest nearby. We were nearly home when Sam had pulled over. It wasn't that far to walk. I wished it had been longer. Sam didn't follow me. I didn't hear his car door open. He just sat there staring out the window at me as I walked away. That more than anything else told me it was over. Sam took that 'protector of the tribe' thing seriously. He'd never let me wander home alone through the woods even a short distance if he really cared about me anymore, and wander I did. I wasn't looking forward to going home to my family. How could I tell them? How could I talk about something so painful? Then I realized I probably wouldn't have to. They'd take one look at my face and they'd know. I wanted to put it off as long as possible.

I walked in circles for some time, crisscrossing my tracks. At one point I saw the prints of a wolf in the mud near one of my footprints when I backtracked. I smiled grimly. I almost hoped a wolf would tear me to shreds. In the end I did go home. My parents were sympathetic. Seth wanted to kill Sam. Emily was furious with him for hurting me. She was determined to tell him off the next time she saw him.

He came to the house the next day, to speak with her. My dad met him at the door, told him formally that he was no longer welcome in our home. I was watching from the upstairs window. I saw Sam nod, and walk away, but I also saw the look of determination on his face. I knew that look. He'd be back. I didn't want to be there when he was.

Dad arranged for me and Emily to go on a camping trip with some friends of his on the Makah reservation. It was good to get away. Camping didn't remind me of Sam because he'd never let me go with Jared and Paul on his camping trips with them.

He found us the day after we left. I should have known. He walked out of the woods and into our campground as me, Emily, and the Twogood family sat around the fire after dinner. Mr. Twogood, Dad's friend, stood up, eyes wary. Sam didn't even look at him. He marched right across to Emily and told her they had to talk.

I'd never seen Emily that way before. She used words I didn't even know she knew. Sam just stood there and took it, as Emily made it very clear that she never wanted to see him again let alone talk to him. When she finally wound down, he hung his head.

"I deserve that, and more, but I need you, Emily," he said, then turned and left.

Mr. and Mrs. Twogood and their son Ted looked on open-mouthed in shock. Even in the firelight I could see Emily blushing as she realized she'd just cursed with the fluidity and creativity of a drunken sailor on leave in front of them.

The whole time, Sam never looked at me, not once.

I didn't sleep at all that night. At first Emily talked to me, trying to comfort me, but my eyes were dry. I was numb inside, and she fell asleep while I watched the tree branches' shadows dance against the tent in the night wind.

Mrs. Twogood saw that I was dead on my feet, so she suggested I stay in the tent and take a nap that afternoon while the others went fly fishing in the river. I must've dozed off because the next thing I knew I heard shouting.

I ran out of the tent and saw Mr. Twogood and his son carrying Emily. She was covered in blood. Her face had been mauled, and her shoulder and arm were scored with gory lacerations. Mrs. Twogood brought up the rear.

"It must've been a bear," she kept muttering. "Nothing else is big enough to do that."

They lay Emily on a sleeping bag. Her face was so white. I tried to go to her, but Mrs. Twogood pulled me back.

"Let Ted do his job, he's pre-med." Through the strain in her voice I could hear the mother's pride coming through. Ted bandaged Emily as best he could. She was semi-conscious, moaning through it all. I watched, feeling helpless and useless, and wished fiercely that it had been me.

We got her to the clinic on the Makah reservation. I stayed outside in the waiting room as they stitched Emily back together. Her facial lacerations were deep, the ones on her shoulder and arm less so, but they would all leave scars. Emily's perfect face was perfect no longer. Selfishly, I wondered what Sam would think when he saw her again, then hated myself for being so petty. The Twogoods went home to sleep, saying they'd come back in the morning. The nurse tried to get me to go too, but I wouldn't, and the Twogoods didn't know me well enough to insist.

I was by Emily's bedside when she woke, holding her uninjured hand.

"Emily?"

Her eyes opened and she looked at me. Her face was half covered by bandages, and the other side was swollen, but she was alive.

"Leah?"

"You're going to be OK," I reassured her, squeezing her hand gently.

Her eyes frowned, and she tried to lift her hand to touch her face.

"No, don't!" I exclaimed, worried that she'd pull out the stitches.

"My face?"

I swallowed. How could I tell her? "They had to stitch it, that's why it hurts."

Her eyes grew big, shocked. "I remember," she whispered. "Oh Leah, it was awful."

"Don't talk about it now, you have to rest." Tears were blurring my vision. I had to get out of there. Emily had enough to worry about without seeing me cry. I hadn't been able to get through to mom and dad. Our answering machine was broken and dad hated cellphones. "I'll go get a nurse."

I turned blindly, found the nearest nurse and told her Emily was awake. Then I went outside and cried until there weren't any tears left. Why had this happened to Emily? She was a good person.

When I went back inside it was after visiting hours, but I snuck past the nurse at the front desk.

Someone had snuck in before me. Shocked immobile, I stood rooted in place as I heard Sam's voice coming from Emily's room. They'd been talking for some time.

"…ever forgive me?"

"I don't know," said Emily faintly. "I didn't realize what you were. It's partly my fault too, those things I said." I didn't have to see Emily to know she was shuddering, I could hear it in her voice. That was so like her, to take on the guilt. I know she felt bad about Sam falling in love with her. "I didn't believe you."

Was that Sam…crying? Muted sobs came from Emily's room.

"Please," he begged. "Tell me what I can do to make this right. Anything. If you want me to die, I'll do it." He broke down then, the sobs torrential, wrenching gasps of pain.

I felt my hand come up to cover my mouth. Was Sam actually offering to kill himself? Even now, even after he rejected me, the sound of his grief was enough to make me melt. I took a step towards the door, and saw into the room.

Sam had thrown his arms around Emily's middle and was crying into her belly. Emily's eyes were soft, and I saw her reach out with her unbandaged hand to touch his hair gently, running her fingers through it wonderingly. It was a shockingly intimate thing to do. I told myself she was just being Emily. My cousin could never stay mad at anyone for very long. It was a fluke, that was all. When she got better she'd go back to being angry with him.

Only she didn't.

Emily came back to live with us, and Sam would visit her. Not inside, he respected my father's insistence that he never set foot in our house again. However, Emily could come and go as she pleased. She'd go for walks and come back flushed, her eyes shining. I tried not to notice, to pretend it was just a reaction to the fresh air, but kiss swollen lips are unmistakable. A month passed this way.

Seth, being Seth, noticed nothing except that I was unhappy and that I didn't hang out with Emily as much as I used to. Mom was extra affectionate, quietly patting me on the shoulder, or giving unexpected hugs. Dad watched me with pain in his eyes, but neither of them said anything. I think they knew I had to be able to pretend everything was fine.

Then I came home early one day and couldn't pretend anymore. I was meeting Sybil and Mara, two friends from school, for lunch before they went off to college. I forgot my wallet and had to turn around and go back for it.

I walked into my room, the room I shared with Emily, and found them together on my bed. So much for Sam respecting my father's wishes. I just stood there as they flinched apart, straightening and buttoning rumpled clothing.

"Leah, I'm so sorry, I can explain…" Emily whispered, red with embarrassment.

"No, let me." Sam stood up, one shirt-tail in and one out of his jeans. They were still zipped up I noticed, my brain glomming on to stupid details like it did whenever I was stressed. I wrenched my gaze away from his pants and looked at him.

And he looked back at me. For the first time in a long time, Sam looked me in the eyes and actually saw me, acknowledged me, now that it didn't matter.

"Get out." I was surprised how calm I sounded. "Get out of my house."

Emily started crying. Sam winced, but kept his eyes on me.

"I'll go, but I'm taking Emily with me," he said evenly.

"I think her parents might have something to say about that," I told him distantly. Was this really me? Was I really talking, making sense? Inside I felt like the little control I had left was slipping away.

"She's nineteen, she can do what she likes."

"Where will you go? What will you do?" I asked practically in that so-calm voice. "Your mom's house is barely big enough for the two of you, and I've seen your room. Emily's suitcase would take up your whole closet."

"Emily's going to have the old Fisher place. I've already spoken to the Tribal Elders about it and they agreed to let her stay there."

I felt my gaze wander over to Emily. She was kneeling on the floor, hands over her ruined face, trying to stifle her tears.

"She's not Quileute, she's Makah," I told him. "The elders won't give a house to a Makah."

Emily looked up, shocked. I'd never brought up the fact that she was from a different tribe before. It hadn't mattered since we were family. I didn't even mean to make it sound like I looked down on her for being Makah, I was just pointing out facts.

"The Elders agreed because she's mine," growled Sam, demanding my attention. "Emily and I belong together. I'm sorry if it hurts you, but that's the way it is."

He didn't sound sorry, I noted. It was like I was watching everything through a sieve which filtered out all emotion. I nodded as if what Sam said made sense, as if it were a logical conclusion.

"Well if that's the way it is, then maybe you should just take her and go," I suggested politely. I even stepped back and held the door open for them.

Emily cried out in distress, and Sam, ever a sucker for a damsel in distress, went to her and drew her to her feet. They left, Sam not looking at me, Emily staring at me over her shoulder as he guided her down the stairs. Her scars were healing nicely. The stitches were out and they weren't as angry a red as they had been.

I walked into my room and shut the door.

To be continued…


	3. Chapter 3: Wolf

CHAPTER THREE: Wolf

Bitterness isn't something that springs up overnight. It grows over time. Seeing Emily and Sam together was unavoidable. We ran into each other in town, at tribe functions, or just out socializing. Everyone was civil to each other. It was all very polite, no screaming matches or scenes.

Inside I was dying. The way they looked at each other seemed to twist the invisible the dagger piercing my heart. It was excruciating.

I avoided them as best I could.

Emily couldn't take it. She tried calling the house. I spent some of the money I'd saved for college to go buy us a new answering machine so I could screen our calls. My family knew not to put her through.

Finally she just showed up at the house one day. Dad answered the door. He tried to get rid of her, but Emily wouldn't leave, and dad was too soft-hearted to make her. I could hear their voices from the kitchen.

"It's alright, dad," I called out.

I put down the jar of spaghetti sauce I'd planned to use for dinner. Emily would've made her own sauce, from scratch. I felt my lips tighten. It was just another thing she was better at than I was. I left the kitchen, walked past dad and Emily out into the front yard and waited for Emily to follow. I knew she would. She'd come to see me after all.

"What is it, Emily?" I crossed my arms in front of me as I turned to face her. I knew it wasn't exactly welcoming, but I didn't care.

She clasped her hands in her skirt, rumpling the fabric unconsciously. "Leah, I hate what happened between us. I miss you. Can't we be friends again?"

I just stared. Was she crazy? I'd lost Sam, my Sam, to her.

Emily swallowed and stared at the ground. "OK, maybe not friends, but I'd really like it if you could find it in your heart to forgive us." She glanced up pleadingly. "It's tearing Sam apart."

So that was it. Everything wasn't perfect in Sam and Emily's brave new world. Emily was here because she was trying to make her paradise even more perfect. Heaven forbid Sam should be upset. I shook my head in disbelief.

"How can you ask me that?" Emily knew how I felt about Sam. She knew and she'd gone off with him anyway.

"Please, Leah. I miss you. I want to make things right."

I thought of the way people always watched surreptitiously whenever Sam, Emily, and I were in the same room. Everyone knew he'd dumped me for her. I hated the pity and speculation I saw in their eyes, like they were waiting for me to go after my cousin and ex-boyfriend with a carving knife. I was sick of how careful people were around me, sick of being watched.

"Fine," I said abruptly. "I'll forgive you."

Maybe people would stop staring if they thought everything was fine between Emily, Sam, and me. I walked past Emily back towards the house.

"Leah…"

Her voice stopped me but I didn't turn around. "What?"

"Sam and I are getting married in a year or so. I want you to be my bridesmaid, just like we always planned."

I closed my eyes against the pain. Why did she have to remember our stupid childhood pact now? We'd planned our weddings when we were twelve, and we said we'd be each other's bridesmaids. How could she not see how impossible that was?

"Sure, if you'd like," I found myself saying. In a year, maybe Sam would grow tired of her like he'd grown tired of me. Maybe he'd move on to a new love. Anything could happen in a year.

Emily's arms stole around me. "Thank you, Leah."

I cleared my throat and gently disentangled myself. "I've got to go get dinner ready," I said, and ran inside, not looking back.

Months passed. I spent a lot of time with my family. Seth discovered internet role playing games, and since it was my laptop he was using to play them, he played them with me sometimes. I was stuck in that limbo between high school and real life. Friends went on to college or jobs, but I seemed to just stay in a rut. I didn't know what to do with my life now that Sam wasn't a part of it anymore. God, how I wish I hadn't blown off college to be with Sam. How stupid was that?

Embry joined Sam's little gang of friends. He seemed to just shoot up like a weed overnight. Everyone seemed to be changing, growing, except me.

Then I changed too. I thought I was getting the flu. I felt sick, feverish. I went to bed early that night, tossing and turning on my bed, not wanting to wake mom and dad. Dad hadn't been feeling well and mom was already worried enough about him. Seth's room was right next to mine though, and he heard me. I heard him scratch at my door and pop his head around the corner.

The top of his head wasn't too far from the door lintel. Seth had grown a lot this summer.

"Leah, you OK?"

"I'm fine, Seth," I called softly. "Go back to bed."

"You don't sound alright," he said doubtfully and padded into my room.

"It's just the flu. I'll be OK."

Seth gave a disbelieving look and put his hand on my forehead. I swatted it away. "Go away Florence Nightingale."

"Huh?"

I guess all that game playing had rotted his brain. "Famous nurse in the Crimean War."

My little brother shrugged it off as unimportant. "You're burning up," he told me. "I'm going to open your window."

"Fine, whatever you like," I told him. Nausea roiled through me. I just hoped I wasn't about to barf in front of Seth. He'd never let me live it down.

Propping open the window, Seth nodded to himself and made his way back to the doorway.

"Call me if you need anything," he said, then shut the door.

I blinked at it in astonishment. My little brother was looking out for me? I was supposed to be looking out for him. I groaned quietly into my pillow and forced myself to stay still. He'd be asleep soon, and once Seth fell asleep nothing short of a brass band playing a Sousa march could wake him.

It got worse before it got better. I was so hot. I threw off my covers and then my nightgown and ran to the window, leaning out into the cool night air. The night seemed to be calling out to me, filling me, and suddenly my body seemed too small to encompass the siren call. I leaned further out the window, and then I was falling, my body exploding outward.

I was in wolf form by the time I reached the ground, landing on paws instead of feet. It was horrifying. It was exhilarating. I was me, yet not-me. I could smell things, hear things that I never could have as a human. I threw back my head and sniffed the night air. An owl was flying overhead. I heard its wings, smelled its aroma. There was a rabbit in the back garden, snarfing on mom's lettuce. I growled low in my throat and raced over.

With a crunch, the rabbit's neck was snapped. I spat it out, horrified. But part of me wasn't horrified, and demanded I finish the job, eat the rabbit, tear flesh from bone and let it drop down my throat. Shuddering, I ran for the forest. What was happening to me?

Then the voices came in my head, and I wasn't alone anymore. At first I thought they were figments of my imagination, a sign that I truly was insane and this was a delusion. I couldn't be feeling the mulch-like consistency of the earth beneath my paws, or feeling the wind ruffling fur, not hair.

The voices assured me they were real, and gave me names. Paul, Jared, Embry.

Sam.

It was his voice that convinced me. As he spoke I could feel his regret, his horror that I should be the one who'd changed, as if he hadn't screwed up my life enough already. The others felt his thoughts as well, and I could sense their embarrassment, their discomfort as if I were reading the expressions off their faces.

That's when I realized they could hear my thoughts as well. I wrenched my mind off the hurt and betrayal I felt whenever I thought of Sam, and focused on the rabbit.

'It's OK,' Jared thought reassuringly. 'It was just a rabbit.'

'Yeah, tasty little buggers,' thought Paul, and I pictured his toothy grin though I couldn't actually see it.

'Girls,' thought Embry dismissively. 'Squeamish over a rabbit.'

I felt embarrassment wash over me. I was being dissed by a sixteen year old.

'A sixteen year old werewolf,' Embry thought back triumphantly.

I stopped running and sat down on my haunches, the calm of the forest wrapping around me like a blanket.

A werewolf. I'd heard the legends, who in the tribe hadn't? I felt myself shaking my head, my doggie shaped head, with its long muzzle and a wet nose that was so sensitive it was automatically identifying the plants and animals around me. This couldn't be happening. I looked down at my paws, and dug my nails into the turf. I felt hysteria rising. What if I couldn't change back?

The voices came back then, wrapping themselves around me, all talking at once, yet I could hear and understand. We were one mind; yet separate selves. When Sam decided to come and get me, I knew it as soon as the others did, and felt his quick flash of concern about how Emily would feel about it.

No. Not you, Sam. Anyone but you.

Sam felt that too. I pulled my haunches off the ground and prepared to run.

'Stay there.' Sam ordered it, and suddenly I couldn't move. I sat back down with a thump. I worried at the command, tried to push it aside, but I couldn't. It chafed to have to obey, but obey I did. Sam was the pack leader; his word was law. It was to become the part of my new existence that I hated the most.

'Stupid girl,' I heard Embry mutter in my head, and felt Sam's displeasure wash over him.

Sam's wolf form, when it appeared through the trees, shocked me. He was black as midnight, and huge, bigger than me. I felt myself give a whine of fear and tried to back away, but it was like my feet were nailed to the ground. I'd felt so strong when I first transformed, but that was before I saw Sam.

Would he kill me? Get rid of me now that he had Emily and didn't need me anymore? His embarrassment over me was palpable. I felt it. The others felt it too, judging by the way their voice-like presence trembled restlessly in my brain. They saw me through his eyes too, and I realized that my form was smaller than all of theirs as they compared themselves to it and smugly came out the better for it.

Sam's eyes winced.

'Knock it off, you guys!' he commanded, and they were silent.

'Leah,' Even in wolf form, even without vocalizing it, Sam could still say my name and my whole world narrowed to him. I trembled, helpless against the pull of him, waiting.

'I could never hurt you, Leah.'

I felt his thoughts, knew they were true, but also false. He had hurt me. I glared at him accusingly, letting memories of his promises to me, promises he'd broken, spill out.

Sam winced again. 'I meant physically.'

I pulled myself together. He was right. He saw himself as the protector, the leader of a pack, and I was now a part of that pack. I saw from the others' thoughts just what that meant, patrolling our land, guarding it against the bloodsuckers.

Wait, bloodsuckers? That old myth was true too?

Affirmation, eager yeses and anticipation of battle filled my head. This is what the pack was born for. This was our job. More important than Sam or I, this was our reason for being. I bowed to the inevitable.

0-0-0

I went home to the shock of finding my parents awake and waiting for me, with my tatty old robe at the ready. Sam politely looked away as he talked me through the process of transforming back. He'd called my parents the moment he'd felt me change to let them know.

He left me with them and loped away without a second glance. I knew dad was a tribal elder, but he'd never seemed to take it all that seriously before. I realized that the elders, including dad, knew a lot more than I'd ever dreamed.

Dad hugged me, told me he was proud of me, but the worry in his eyes belied that. Mom cried, asked if I was OK. Seth slept through the whole thing.

I didn't hang out much with the boys while in human form. They convinced me to go cliff diving with them once or twice. It was weird feeling more powerful even while human. I was still smaller than them in build though, and they never let me forget it. After a while the endless joshing, and the male type humor grated. I was not one of the boys. I'd never be one of the boys. I was the odd man out in our little pack. I couldn't bear to hang out with them at Emily and Sam's house, and Sam, to his credit, never forced me to. He had me help patrol when he needed me. Other than that he left me alone.

Dad died of a heart attack when I was out on patrol one night. I didn't get back until it was all over. Mom had to go through the terrifying ride to the hospital, fill out the forms, and everything with only Seth to help her. I hated being a wolf. I loved being a wolf. The werewolf curse took Sam from me, but it also gave me a sense of power, of indestructibility that I just didn't have as a human, and dad's death taught me just how frail humans could be.

Jacob Black changed next. He'd been a nice kid, once upon a time. Then he took up with the bloodsucker's girlfriend. Sam ordered him not to tell her anything, but he found a way around it. I was angry at first, we all were. I'd caught the scent of bloodsuckers while on patrol, always too late to help the humans they slaughtered.

It's hard to describe how a vampire smells, because it isn't just a smell, it's a wrong-ness. It's like the absence of normal, the cessation of how things should be, a huge black hole of antimatter set right in the middle of good clean earth and forest. It reeks.

Still, I have to admit Bella gave us vital information. She did it at Emily and Sam's house, so I got it second hand from the pack's memories. I got more than that from them as well.

Jacob loved Bella. He loved her with a single-minded passion, with a hopelessness that I couldn't help but identify with.

He brought her to the bonfire, the gathering of tribal elders, and she heard with the rest of us the tale of how the Quileutes became werewolves. Emily and Sam sat across the fire from my family. I was careful not to look at them. It hurt too much, and the boys would see that hurt the next time I transformed if I happened to remember it. I tried not to look at Jacob and Bella either. He'd be in seventh heaven for days because she'd come. I remembered when I'd felt that way about Sam.

The bitterness grew.


	4. Chapter 4: Fight

CHAPTER FOUR: Fight

Word came that more vampires were on their way to invade our territory. We needed to be ready.

When the battle came our numbers had swelled to ten. My brother, Seth, and two others, Colin and Brady, newly turned at age thirteen, joined the pack. In my mind all three were babies and far too young for battle, though Seth disagreed, vehemently. He was thrilled to be a wolf.

"It's better than World of Warcraft," he said when he first changed. It was like nature or something knew that we were shorthanded, and enlarged the pack accordingly.

Only Jacob, and Sam too of course, seemed to feel the drawbacks and regrets of being a werewolf.

Sam.

I still loved him. Some part of me withered each time I saw him with Emily, so happy, so in love. I wanted him back.

I began to wonder if anyone could ever fall in love and stay that way. Did Jacob have a chance with Bella? He seemed to think so, but what if she chose him and he imprinted on someone else? Quil had just imprinted on a two year old little girl. Jared imprinted on Kim. I saw through their eyes, felt with their feelings, and knew the terrifying force of imprinting. How could you trust any man, especially a Quileute one, to make a commitment and stick with it?

Embry's mother was a case in point. Some Quileute man, a descendent of the original chief, had impregnated her while married to someone else. She'd moved to our reservation and settled here to raise Embry. I wondered what his father thought of that, if he was still cheating on his wife. I don't know why I was so interested. I had no great love for Embry, who constantly thought of me as stupid and weak, but questions like that whirled around my brain. It annoyed him and the others when my thoughts drifted off in that direction, but I couldn't help it.

I kept expecting the pain of Sam's betrayal to go away. I thought that realizing the inevitability of imprinting would make me stop hurting, but it didn't matter that Sam's love for Emily wasn't his fault, not where my heart was concerned.

Then Jacob did something completely unexpected. He suggested we ally ourselves with the bloodsuckers.

Weird doesn't begin to cover how we felt in that meadow, being schooled in vampiric tactics by the Cullen coven. When we entered the meadow in wolf form, I thought I'd pass out from the stench.

Sam's voice steadied us, and we were able to watch and learn. It was instructive. In wolf form, my senses were already attuned to fighting, inborn instincts ready and able to kick in at any sign of threat, but hearing from the bloodsuckers themselves how they thought and fought gave us insights we'd need.

They were so fast. We were too, but watching them laugh and joke about it was, I admit, intimidating. I don't know how Jacob could stand being near them. Jacob even walked right past the ones called Edward and Alice to lick Bella's face. I felt his laughter in my head. Most of the pack emanated disapproval, but Jacob ignored it. Bella was the one he loved. I could understand that.

I walked past the bloodsuckers with the others, inhaling their wrongness, memorizing the subtle differences. For Jacob's sake, I'd avoid killing these vampires.

'Assuming you manage to kill any,' Embry scoffed in my head.

'Leave my sister alone!' Seth, my brave little brother, was quick to defend me.

'Calm down, you two.' It was an order from Sam, so they quieted.

I noticed that for the next training session Sam sent only Jacob. When in wolf form we'd know everything he'd learned, so it made sense, but it rankled too.

I came to be grateful for the instruction when it came time to fight. According to plan, we split the bloodsuckers into two groups. They were wild, and the sense of wrongness rolling off them was even worse than that of the Cullens.

We let the Cullens take on the group in the meadow while we, well, we did what we do best.

The newborn vampires moved through the forest quickly, in a flanking maneuver. We trailed them soundlessly, our minds and hearts linked. This was what we were born for.

One of the vampires in the back paused just as the breeze shifted. He'd caught our scent!

I lunged forward, knocking him off his feet. One yell, one shout and he'd alert the others. We weren't ready yet. I went for his throat, my teeth scrabbling against its marble-like surface. He lowered his chin, instinctively protecting it, so I drew my teeth up a little and ripped off his jaw. Something grabbed my tail. I resisted, whining a little at the pain, and took the thing's head completely off. The headless thing kept clenching at me; then Sam was there, ripping at its arms. The vampire loosened its grip on my tail and I took out its legs. Between the two of us, Sam and I had it in pieces.

We got them where we wanted them and attacked, herding them where we wanted them to go. I felt my pack brothers engaging the enemy around me, felt answering snarls in my own throat as battle lust coursed through me. Paul, Jared, and Sam, the oldest of our bunch, took on the bigger ones while the rest of us took what we could get. My jaws clamped down on rock hard limbs, crunching, grinding them into gravel. My speed was an asset now, and I kept away from the vampires' reach. I found that if I could just get them on the ground, the others were able to rend them more easily, and there was always someone there to rend. With our mental bond we worked as a team. It was effortless, like a well-oiled machine, and I felt glad to be a part of it.

All too soon it was over. Their stench filled the forest, their pieces still twitching. Sam went from body to body, crunching a few last bits just to be sure. The adrenaline was just beginning to fade, when Embry and Quil began their good-natured wrangling over who had killed the most vamps. They began reminiscing over all the kills.

Embry was more than happy to point out that I alone hadn't made any solo kills. Each of the vamps I'd incapacitated had been dispatched by the others. Sam rumbled a warning in the form of a growl.

All of a sudden my elation disappeared. I withdrew to the edge of the clearing.

Then I smelled it, another vampire, its scent complete and not in pieces. It was hiding…there! In the crook of an ancient cedar. I shot after it. I'd show Embry I was perfectly capable of killing a bloodsucker on my own.

I charged as it came at me, going fast, so very fast. I feinted right, feeling its rock hard fingers scrape my sides. I turned, but it had already pivoted and was swinging its arms together. I wasn't going to be able to get free of it in time!

I sensed Jacob's intention before I felt him knock me out of the way. The vamp's arms closed around him instead of me. I heard Jacob's bones crunch, felt his agony like it was my own.

Growling, I sprang up from the dirt and crunched down on the top of the vampire's skull. It released Jacob. I leapt away with the top of the creature's head in my mouth, and spat out the foul tasting hair. Then Sam and Paul were there, knocking the creature off its feet, completing the unbalancing maneuver I'd started. It was over quickly. Sam took the top half and Paul the bottom.

Jacob was writhing in agony. I licked at his ear and whined while thinking my apologies at him. We had to get him home, to La Push, as quickly as possible. We all knew it. There were other reasons to leave as well. Another group of vampires was coming, and the Cullens needed us gone before they arrived. So we left.

Jacob nearly died because of me. He had to stay human so he could recuperate. During that time Bella visited him. The moment he became wolf again, we all felt his pain. She broke his heart.

My guilt doubled. I was weak, useless. I couldn't help him.

Guilt's a funny thing. When you wallow in it, it can make you do crazy things, the opposite of what you wanted to do.

I watched and felt Jacob Black grieving over his Bella after she rejected him. He mooned around for days and days.

I went to the cliff, where he'd gone to mope some more, intending to snap him out of it. Instead I picked a fight with him. I was angry that he was sad. I did everything I could think of to make him angry too. Anything was better than this bone deep despair. I had enough despair of my own without his too.

All I did was bait him into hurting me back. He threw Sam's love for Emily in my face, and made fun of the fact that I was still in love with Sam, hopelessly, desperately, in love with him.

I spat at him, actually spit like a schoolgirl in a playground fight, and ran away.

Jacob ran too. I was in wolf form when it happened. I felt him go, felt the memory of getting Bella's wedding invitation, and knew how it ripped him up inside. Quil and Embry ran after him, but Sam called them back. I phased back to human form when Sam commanded it.

He let Jacob go.

Sam actually let him go, and for the first time I felt hope bloom again.

To Be Continued…


	5. Chapter 5: Alone

CHAPTER FIVE: Alone

I ran.

I ran away from the pack, without permission, without Sam's blessing. In wolf form I could cover ground more quickly. I waited until everyone was asleep but Seth, who was on patrol. I knew he at least would never betray me. He whined, pleaded, but promised not to go to Sam. Sam would wake up in eight hours or so and find me gone.

I wondered how he would feel. Relieved? Angry? Would he even care at all?

I put my head down and ran north, the backpack of clothes, money, and supplies strapped to my back not slowing me at all. I ran all night long. A little past dawn I felt Sam change, and his voice was in my head, worried, demanding to know why my presence was so faint. I immediately phased back to human form. He'd figure it out soon enough from Seth. It took a while but I found a town with a bus stop and bought a ticket. Canada wasn't far enough away. When I got to Hudson Bay I cautiously phased back into wolf form, and felt Sam's voice, faint, but there.

I phased back again and stayed human. I've been human ever since, during the long slow journey up to Greenland, to the abandoned research station. Having a higher than normal body temperature is about the only thing that kept me alive on the journey.

I'm out of supplies now. It's time to hunt.

I throw one last look out the window, strip off my clothes and open the door. The cold blast of air hits my body like a sledgehammer. I gasp and phase, pulling the handle closed with my teeth. I don't want to return to an ice box.

It's good to run again as a wolf. All my senses are heightened, and I revel in the information they give me. I bark with joy and set off to hunt.

The voices are there, but so faint that it's possible to ignore them. I find prey and eat it, trotting back to the research station with a full belly, content. I can go for a week off what I've eaten. Maybe then I'll figure out a way to block out the pack's presence in my head.

It didn't take a week for him to find me.

He must have bought a plane ticket the minute he felt me phase. Sam's good, I'll have to give him that. Perhaps I didn't realize phasing would give him a fix on my position, since I already knew where the pack was located, and I wasn't looking for them. Sam, on the other hand, was actively trying to find me, and our pack link must have given him the information he needed.

I stared out the window and watched the dark form of a wolf loping towards the station. He was coated in snow, obviously from having run through the storm. He disappeared around the corner of the building. I kept gazing out the window, my back towards the door as it opened, letting in the arctic air until it closed behind him with a dull thud.

I gave him a minute to unstrap the pants tied to his leg and put them on. I could hear the fabric being pulled up his body, and the sound of a zipper.

Still I waited.

The silence dragged on, then he spoke, shakily.

"We want you back, Leah."

It was Jacob's voice. Sam had sent Jacob Black to come and get me. How like him. He probably thought he was being sensitive to my needs. I closed my eyes.

"So, you returned to the pack?" I asked without turning from the window. "What about Bella?" I was genuinely curious. He'd loved her for so long. I thought for sure we'd never see him again after she married her Edward and became a vampire.

"Bella made her choice," Jacob said roughly.

"Hmmm," So he'd finally given her up. I supposed that meant she'd transformed, become a bloodsucker. I was sorry for Jacob. I was sorry for all of us. I sighed against the window, watching my breath fog it up before the air cooled the window down enough so the fog disappeared. I saw Jacob's image in the window staring at me, so intently. The window made it look as if…as if…

As if he were looking at me like I was his whole world.

I frowned. That couldn't be right.

"Leah, turn around and look at me." Jacob's voice was still shaken. I should have been angry. What right did he have to order me around? But there was something in his voice that made it a plea, not an order.

Oh hell, no. Please tell me that Jacob Black did not just imprint on me, the weak one, the useless one of the pack, the one who ran away and had to be brought back like a lost child. How cruel could God be, to take Bella away from him, then make him imprint on someone he despised, someone despicable like me? I thought imprinting happened at first sight, not later after relationships were damaged, probably beyond repair.

I couldn't stay staring out the window forever, though I wanted to.

"Please," he said, like a prayer.

I turned around slowly, hoping I wouldn't see what I knew would be in his eyes, that involuntary, horrible adoration. It was there.

At the same second I saw it in his eyes, the world stopped for me, too.

Imprint.

Fascination. Adulation. Tenderness. The coming together of a genetic imperative to keep the pack alive and healthy. It didn't matter that I was four years older than he was. It didn't matter that he'd loved Bella and I'd loved Sam. It was as irresistible as gravity, as strong as a tornado. There was nothing we could do or say, no hurt we could inflict on each other that would change this bond between us. It was like a cosmic compensation for everything we'd been through, not what we wanted at all, but what we needed.

Some love stories don't have a happy ending, but sometimes, unexpectedly, they do.

A/N: That's the end. I'm not entirely happy with it, and I know the purists out there will point to the 'love at first sight' aspect of imprinting, but this is what I wanted for Jacob and Leah, some small bit of happiness to make up for what they went through. Life isn't fair, but through fiction, you can force it to be, at least in your stories.


End file.
